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Dating During the Holidays 101

Thanksgiving is less than 12 hours away; Christmas and New Years Eve will quickly follow. With only a few hours to go, many of you are still contemplating if it’s appropriate to bring home the individual you’ve been seeing. Here are a few situations and how to handle dating during the holidays.

On spending the holidays together

If you’ve only been dating and there is no exclusivity: I say don’t bring him/her home just yet. You would hate to find out you are not as compatible as you first thought and have your parents ask the inevitable question the following year: ‘Whatever happen to your friend?’

A newly committed relationship: Although I understand you may want to spend the holidays with your significant other, this one depends on how new the relationship is. If it’s less than three months, I would only suggest spending Thanksgivings together under the circumstances it’s a “Friendsgiving,” a trend among millennials who cannot—or choose not to—make it back home from Thanksgiving (the same for Christmas and New Years Eve).

If you will be spending this day with your family, it’s not the best idea. You want to be sure you know this person well before you introduce him or her to your family. Anything less than 90 days does not give you enough time to make a detailed observation.  However, it is okay to attend a New Years Eve soiree together.

On exchanging Christmas gifts

 If you’ve only been dating and there is no exclusivity: Absolutely not! No need to purchase a gift for someone, if you’re not certain if this is someone you want in your life. If you are positive this can lead to a healthy relationship, a card and a small thoughtful gift no more than $20 is fine. Fellas, there are several fashion forward accessories in H&M and Forever 21 that will make her smile. Ladies, a dope scarf, hat or gloves is okay. Anything you know s/he will think ‘Wow that was sweet.’ 

A newly committed relationship: Absolutely yes! However, you should still subscribe to the rule above something small and thoughtful. You don’t want to break the bank for someone who’s still proving if s/he deserves your love and affection. You can up the ante just a bit, contingent on your salary.

*If s/he birthday falls during the holidays: Yes, birthdays are important. Again, subscribe to the rule above.

Now that we’ve figure that out let’s get serious.

What if your family and friends dislike your significant other? By the holiday season, you should have had a conversation with your family and friends about your significant other (and vice versa) where a line of respect was established. Therefore everyone should be able to have a decent night without any party feeling disrespected. I do suggest treading lightly on the wine and spirits.

 What do you say to your family and friends who inquire about an old flame? If you’re anything like me, everyone knows a head of time if I don’t bring the individual up then neither should you. If you're positive your love ones will ask about a past partner simply respond with, “We’re not dating anymore.” Your disposition is what will prompt individuals to continue to inquire. If you answer with ease and calmly change the topic at hand, more than likely people will back off. If you’re defensive people will want to know what happened. So answer like a boss and you’ll be okay.

Happy Holidays!

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