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#AnalSex Is It For You?

It is believed the average man discusses sex more than the average woman. However, I strongly disagree. Men may speak in generalizations, where women will reveal intimate detailed accounts to a select few, hence why some women find their female friends in bed with their man. We just talk too damn much! I’ll digress that’s a topic for another time.

My friends and I can dish about sex all day, if you let us. Perhaps it’s just us, but most recently, anal sex has been the topic of conversation. In my opinion, anal sex has become, well, mainstream. I remember reading an article on Cosmopolitan.com about a 39-year-old mother who had multiple orgasms during anal sex, which of course piqued my interest. I mean let’s be real all a girl really wants out of life is to eat without getting fat, lots of wine and multiple orgasms.

After reading that article I phoned one of my best friends from college. During our sophomore year of undergrad, I recalled us having a rather descriptive conversation about her first time trying anal sex. I will never forget she said, “It felt like he lit a match and placed it up my ass.” I don’t remember where we were on campus, but I do remember having the emoji surprise face following an explosion of laughter. She vowed to never try it again. Nearly five years later, as we all approach the quarter century mark, her standpoint has changed. Oh how time changes everything.

During one of our most recent conversations she confessed to trying anal sex again, but this time her response was oh so different.  Read about her experience below (as told by her, edited by me):

With my recent boyfriend, who I very much trust and love I decided to give this [anal sex] a real effort. We used a condom for bacteria sake and oodles of lube.  Upon initial penetration it does feel, well, foreign.  You’re experiencing pressure and your reaction is to push “it” out.  But with just a little more patience, it’s like you break the threshold and it begins to feel good.  It actually is amazing and feels quite fine once you get over the initial “tough part.” During our first anal experience I climaxed three times back-to-back. I was moaning like a wild woman and craved more.  It’s really an indescribable feeling.  The main component is guiding your partner, literally directing him how to enter you (i.e. “slow, slow…wait, wait…ease in, ease in”).  He can’t feel what you’re feeling so let him know.

What really stimulated me was watching porn.  I always wondered how the hell can they take it up the ass like that and actually enjoy it. I mean they don’t appear to be in pain, but it looks painful (if that makes any sense).

There are several misconceptions; one being your anal cavity will not close up again. That is absolutely a myth. The rectum is a muscle and that is why it’s so tight.  The only way to have your behind stretched is if the anal sex is extremely rough and the penis is extremely large.  I will say the first time around you may experience some “loose booty,” but it’s only for a day— IF that.

Another misconception is you experience pain every single time. That is not the case. Once you have participated in this act about three good times, you no long experience “pain.” Think of it as putting in work to have total satisfaction.

In closing, I do believe you should perform this with someone you are completely and totally comfortable with.  Remember there is no such thing as too much lube!

So what have we learned?

  1. Anal sex can give you multiple orgasms
  2. There is no such thing as too much lubrication
  3. You will not have “loose booty”
  4. It will not be painful every single time
  5. Do not perform this act with just anyone
  6. CONDOMS! USE THEM!

-XOXO

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